My blog abandonment can be justified by the shrinking countdown; sometimes you just gotta take one for the team. It's early afternoon Friday. In the last week, I've slept a total of 12 hours in my own bed. That means I'm out and about doing all kind of ridiculous shinanigans doing the best YOLO a girl can with such little time left at casa numero due. Tomorrow at this time I'll be on a train headed to Rome with my eight foreign bolognese loves. The day after at this time I'll be the minivan on a New York highway with the best four people I know.
You'll hear all about how the end has gone because let's be real, I've never been anything but honest with you, no? The two weeks as camp counselor, the return of Bianca - host sister MIA escaped to Chicago for the year, the weekend away with the girls at the beach, my "wedding," all the good and all the bad... with time.
But for now picture this. Sitting Indian-style, barefoot and Sofie shorts to keep cool in this heat, I open the big, bad, black suitcase shoved above my closet since September. I am immediately overwhelmed by the difference I feel rushing though myself. Remember when I sat the same way loading up this same suitcase to come here? Goodness gracious, I thought I had everything. I thought I
knew everything. I was so prepared and excited and ready to go! ..... But not even. I feel like a wise guy saying it but looking back I was a kid. What did I know? How do I fit all my people and my tears and the bottled laughs and good food? Is all that I've learned going to get lost during the layover? I can feel my legs buckling under this pressure. No worries mates, my bandage ankle (another story, another time) is keeping me in good posture with shoulders straight ready to take this next part on.
People here ask me if I've changed this year. I respond with wit, "oh but of course, you can see physically how well I ate and mentally how much I thought." Then they ask me how. And there's where I draw a blank. I can't tell you how I'm coming back to you. Surely tired, because these late nights of fluttery jitters aren't doing me any good. But I'm a little nervous but oh so excited. Finally all my loves in 3D! I couldn't even begin to list all the people I can't wait to see but I will assure you nothing will be more satisfying then arriving after a long, terrible plane ride to rush to greet my family. This is one of the moments I've been looking forward to the most and for the longest.
Let me get out of this terrible technological world and live it up while I can. The stories can wait but once I repeat "this one time, when I lived in Italy...." for the hundredth time I know you'll lose your blog loyalty quickly :) Know that I'm here and alive and exploding happiness and freaking out every minute. I can't even decide if this post makes sense but just accept that all the confusion on this page is just an ounce of what's bouncin' in mah brain. All my love.
But you know I'll never let this go to waste,
I'll keep this memory on the map I trace
back to home.
